Advice To The Woman Entering Her Early 20’s. | It’s My Mf Birthday!

As I sit here in quarantine (confused as to how we even got here), I realized that my birthday is in a couple of hours and time is flying by. So i’m on my laptop, during my favorite time of the day (night time), in my pajamas, with a glass of wine, listening to music on my floor, in the vibe, when I had this brilliant idea to write a blog post. I wanted to write a “think-piece” if you will, to the woman out there … just like me, entering her 20’s, or already in her 20’s and give some advice on everything i’ve learned so far.

Congratulations, you’ve made it to (or through) your twenties. You’re here, you’re still alive. But, as we all know, everything that glitters isn’t always gold. Ladies, I struggled during the first half of this whole “20’s decade ordeal.” There are a few things I wish I could go back and change, and things I wish I knew. I’ve learned a lot by watching and listening to (wise) people older than me. And my blog is all about inspiration, so here are some things i’ve learned so far.

#1.) Be Grateful & Humble.

First off, I think every year added on to your life should be celebrated and you should show gratitude. It’s easy to get caught up in the ‘suckiness’ of life sometimes and to take the little things for granted. But I think when you show gratitude and humbleness, everything you want comes to you with ease. Over the years I’ve learned, anything and anyone can be taken from you in a split second. So be appreciative, be grateful … humble yourself.

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#2.) Don’t Be Broke.

This one makes me cringe. We live in a time where it’s all about flexing on other people. Showing off what you have and laughing at what the other people don’t. I live in Houston, and this city is teeming with perpetrators. Dior shoes, but bad credit scores. Look at it this way, your twenties is for you to build … BUILD PEOPLE. Save your money, live below your means, take on investing as a hobby. Work your 9-5 and have a side hustle. There is nothing wrong with that. Pay off debt. Nothing makes my skin crawl more, than talking to older people in their 30’s, 40’s and 50’s, struggling to make ends meet and complaining about how they don’t have enough money and wish they would’ve done things differently financially.

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#3.) Don’t End Up Bitter & Life-less.

This is the one. I have met people older than me that have ended up … boring, bitter and weird. Every time they open their mouth it’s something negative or depressing. There’s no excitement to their lives. They settled for the ‘picture perfect’ and ‘cookie cutter’ lifestyle, but lowkey hate that life. They didn’t live and ended up regretting it. I was guilty of this, because this was once me (mentally, I was going through alot though). No matter what, you have to make a promise to yourself, and do whatever it takes to NEVER end up ‘the bitter old boring lady.’ And as cliche as it might sound, only do things that ignite your soul and gets your adrenaline going.

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#4.) Take Care Of Y.O.U. First.

Self care is always and will always be the major key. Self care to me is physical, so like getting your nails, hair and lashes done ect., but it is also mental, so trying to get a grip on that childhood trauma and understanding how you are in relationships and how you can fix you, is important. This right here, is an investment … in yourself. There are so many people walking around drowning and sulking in their inner problems and it’s hard for them to exude a true radiant beauty on the outside when inside it’s an ugly mess.

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#5.) You Are Your Surroundings.

Be picky about who you choose to be around and who you give your time to. I am guilty because I used to have a hard time deciphering who was trifiling and who was legit. It’s so so so so important to only surround yourself with good people that elevate you in some way. If you feel like a person is not your type of human and they are being weird, distance yourself. You will literally gain nothing, by being around them. I mean… nothing. It’s easier said than done, but you’ll eventually get there.

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#6.) Don’t Take Things Personal & Let The Past Be The Past.

Monica, said it best guys. When other people do shady things, it’s not a reflection on you. People do things because they want to and if you take every little thing personal, you will be disappointed. Don’t hold on to grudges and let things roll off of your back. Say what you need to say right there in that moment to that person’s face. Don’t wait and definitely don’t hesitate. Also, leave the past in the past. Stop going back to what god is forcibly trying to remove.

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Now, I don’t have all the answers to this thing called life, but i’ve seen some things and i’ve learned. So, to that young woman, entering her 20 somethings … confused … unguided and figuring it all out. You’re not alone and it’s not a walk in the park honey. Keep doing you, but play it smart. ♥