I have been thinking about writing a post like this for quite awhile, because it’s so relevant to my current life. As you can tell by the title we’re going to be chatting about leaving the past… in the past. You guessed it. Bare with me as I drag myself for a little bit (which is good sometimes because it pushes me to where I need to be).
I have this thing where I can’t let the past go. I’m terrified to move on, because then i’ll be walking into the unknown. And either the next chapter goes very good or it goes very bad and I’m not sure if I’m prepared to take such a gamble in life. I know, it’s like, if you don’t take risk, then you’re going to stay stagnant in life and how are you ever going to grow? Calm down, i’m self-reflecting.
Not to tie this into dating … but to tie this into dating lol. Recently, at the beginning of this year, the universe slapped me in the back of the head. I had an epiphany. So I found myself talking to an old flame from back in the day. Ya’ll this was my boo okay, I could not picture my life without him in it. We stopped talking for some years after college because of the distance and because we weren’t really ready for all that at the moment, but during that hiatus, I missed him. The dating scene was garbage and I just kept thinking of him and our chemistry, my old bae, the one that I meet at the concert that one night. Long story short, we managed to find each other again and hit off just like old times. We stopped talking once again, bc he had a big secret this time, but I just let it be, because it was what it was.
But i’m nosey asl and there was no way I could just sit there and let my boo pass me by, I wanted to know what he was hiding. He eventually told me the news (& omg can you say ‘heartbreak’), but me being … well me, we hit it off once again lmao! And this time we even had a little relationship! & I’m sure you can guess what happens next, it did not work out. Like at this point, I knew we weren’t meant to be. I was just forcing things at this point, like the universe didn’t even have to send me anymore signs. I was good.
I hate that my connection to this topic has to be tied into dating, because there’s so much more to life, but unfortunately it is. When you go digging around in the past, hoping that something or someone has changed 9/10 it hasn’t. When the past calls, most of the time it has nothing new to say. You’re better off, looking forward to your new future, whatever that might be.
To truly understand this whole ‘leaving the past behind concept’, I had to compare it using an analogy. Imagine yourself walking around your house taking the trash out. This is all of the stuff you’re completely done with. You put it in the trash bag, then put it into the dumpster and rolled it out to the curb for the dumpster truck to take it off somewhere and dump it into a landfill. When you roll the dumpster back in, it’s done with. You don’t sit and dwell on where those pieces of trash are going to end up, wanting those pieces of trash back in your life or how those pieces of trash are doing out there in the world? You just don’t, they’ve served their purpose. It’s easy to let it go, it’s minimal.
That’s how life should be when people, relationships, friendships, jobs, cities and experiences don’t serve you anymore. Let it go, move on and be optimistic for what’s to come next.
Interact and leave a comment, let me know what you think.